Guys, I started back to work on Monday. And despite the fact that it’s only Hump Day (Yes, you can click the link without the fear of naked things showing up.), I’m at the point where I’m actually quite done with my professional life. And trust me, it has NOTHING to do with the kids. They’re not even here! They’re not here yet, and I’m already…right. Anyway.

So instead of posting about things that will be frowned upon by the district, my state lawmakers, and generally anyone who thinks teachers have it easy, I’ve decided to focus on my moment of zen for the week: the greatness that is the new member of the First Family: Sunny Obama.

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Look how cute she is! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Thanks for that moment of sunshine, White House flickr!

I know, I know, they didn’t adopt a shelter dog. And yeah, I know that I should be all liberally righteous about it, but then I also have to point out that one of the kiddos has serious allergies. And PETA’s pretty pissed enough about it for all of us. So they get a pass on that.

PLUS…look how cuuuuuuuuuuuute she is. As I pointed out to my padre today, as she’s all-black and not that tuxedo-style pattern, which means she resembles my sister’s puppy even more than Bo does.

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I know, right? Credit to Arben Imagery, by the by.

Now, I know a lot of people out there are all like: “Who cares? The Obamas are a political family, not a celebrity family. We should be focused on the policy choices that the President makes, not his family dogs.”

But those people are wrong. Dead wrong. And you know why?

Because the way that people treat dogs shows you what kind of person they are, more than their actions with anyone or anything else. Even kids.

I’m not saying that people who aren’t dog people are bad people. I’m just saying that they’re not the best people. And they certainly aren’t good enough to be President. Calvin Coolidge agrees with me.

“Any man who does not like dogs and want them about does not deserve to be in the White House.”

Wise words, Mr. Coolidge. And may I say that I think your presidential hounds were quite adorable. Especially the scruffy one.

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And it’s not just him: all the best presidents had dogs. Washington, Adams, Jefferson (though he had bear cubs, too), Monroe, Lincoln, Roosevelt, Kennedy, Johnson, Clinton – even the Bushes. Though I have, in the past, argued that Dubya’s favorite hound would have made a better president than he did. Much better.

In addition to the fact that owning a dog shows us that our president is a love-capable human and not an unfeeling, cat-tolerating robot, having dogs also gives us a little picture of who our president is outside of that oval office. A picture that will create a common ground; be non-confrontational. I mean, how can you look at a picture of Barack Obama playing with Bo (soon to be pictures of him playing with Sunny) and say he’s the devil?

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You can’t. And if you say you can, then you are either a liar-whore and/or a bad person all around. I mean, my liberal self even liked Dubya when Miss Beasley or Barney was around.

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I mean, it doesn’t hurt that he’s near Laura in this photo, too, but it’s mostly the hound. Because with a pet, you see them as a person you can connect to, despite the large status gap. A real person, not a president or a policy-maker who may or may not be responsible for our country’s success in the international community.

Dogs are the ultimate peacemaker/icebreaker/heart-melter. They are a PR god-send.

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If they weren’t, why would guys use them to pick up chicks? Answer: they wouldn’t.

So the next time that you’re all pissed that Obama has to have Bo and Sunny privately transported to a vacation spot or a political summit, just remember: they’re important. They’re not just pets, they’re members of the First Family.

And there are perks that come with that, dammit. So stop your whining and just be glad that photo of you wearing bunny ears and nothing else isn’t as widely publicized as Bo’s version.

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About Imagine Truth

We seek to learn, and when academics do not present the answers, we look inside our own beautiful imaginations for the key.

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