Break ups are hard.
I’ve written about this before. At the very beginning of my blog, actually. That time, I was writing about the end of a friendship breaking up. Well, two, actually. They were both under 2 years, but it was still rough.
But tonight, after WEEKS and WEEKS of putting it off, I finally pulled the trigger and ended a seven-year relationship.
You know, when it’s time to break up with someone, but you’re dreading it, you’ll do pretty much anything to avoid actually having that sit-down. You’ll put things off, you’ll get busy with “projects,” and hell, you may even plan a trip or two in hopes of postponing the inevitable.
I did that.
I also made the trademark “I can’t handle it until I have________” negotiation.
All of these things bought me about 8 weeks of delay. 8 weeks of pretending that things weren’t over, that maybe we still had one more year in us.
But, as they say, all good things must come to an end.
And tonight, I came to the end of my procrastination rope. I found the Greek frozen yogurt in the Kroger freezer section, bought it, curled up on the sofa with my dogs, and finally watched the last episode of 30 Rock.
I inhabited every cliche in the breakup book. I cried, I thought about all the good times we had together, went through some nostalgic gifs, and I even ate ice cream (okay, well, Greek frozen yogurt) straight from the carton. What the what?
How can I go on without Liz Lemon? She’s the woman who made wearing glasses cool, who gave me new phrases to use in place of profanity in the classroom, and made me feel better about how I look at work sometimes because if she can show up to be a writer at NBC in a bra held together with tape and eating a Snickers for lunch, then I’m doing pretty damn well.
So it’s not that easy for me to say goodbye to my favorite bad role model. Now I’ll have to come up with awkward phrases on my own. Blerg.
These things are a part of life. I’ll get over it, and I’ll be a better woman for it. As Liz Lemon would say, “Well, you know, relationships end. People move on.”
Yeah, they do, Liz. Yeah, they do.
Shut it down. Lemon out.